Hard Times. August 2, 2018

The beauty of pro wrestling is the way it can, when done just right, seamlessly blend athletics and theatrics. And “The American Dream” Dusty Rhodes might just be the single-greatest example of how the “perfect package” isn’t always what you’d expect, but perhaps those who boldly defy expectations. This and more can be found in […]

Cream of the Crop. July 31, 2018

The third entry in this seemingly on-going series of transcribing classic pro wrestling promos into poetry. These are the immortal words of the late, great “Macho Man” Randy Savage (along with those of the equally great “Mean” Gene Okerlund. Wrestlemania III at the Silverdome Pontiac, Michigan. It’s a day that I’m certain my guest at […]

Parts Unknown. July 30, 2018

Another pro wrestling promo-turned-poem. This one is also another all-time classic. Enjoy. Hulk Hogan. Have a question to answer your question. As you, Hulk Hogan, travel to Wrestlemania! by conventional means, the normals you travel with experience malfunctions. As you realize all that is left! is total self-destruction. Do you, Hulk Hogan, show self-pity? Do […]

Genetic-Freakonomics. July 27, 2018

Do your best to find inspiration in the most unexpected of places. For example, I constructed a #poem from the greatest pro wrestling promo EVER. You know they say that all men are created equal, but you look at me and you look at Samoa Joe and you can see that statement is not true. […]