II-II. ONE PUNCH
THE ALLEY BEHIND THE SMALL ART GALLERY. BRENNIFER SPEAKS TO AN OFFICER. OFFICER SLOWLY, YET UN-ASSUREDLY TAKES NOTES ON A HANDY LITTLE NOTEPAD WITH A LITTLE PENCIL.
HAROLD, MEANWHILE, STANDS BY HIS GRANDMOTHER’S STATION WAGON, PATIENTLY WAITING FOR HIS CUE AS IF HE ISN’T ACTUALLY THERE. HE HOLDS A LARGE FRAMED PHOTOGRAPH UNDER EACH ARM.
OFFICER: Okay. So, would you mind going over this one more time for me?
BRENNIFER: What’s the point of writing all this down if you’re just going to have me repeat it?
OFFICER GESTURES TO THE AUDIENCE.
BRENNIFER: Oh. Right. (TO HAROLD) Go on, then.
HAROLD: You sure?
BRENNIFER: (GESTURES TO AUDIENCE) Wouldn’t want complaints about exposition.
HAROLD: (NODS) Of course.
HAROLD DROPS, SHATTERS FRAMED PHOTOS.
(PRETENDS TO CARE) Oh, no…
(TO BRENNIFER) Like that?
BRENNIFER: It’ll do.
OFFICER: That’s it?
BRENNIFER: Don’t make me have to do this again.
HAROLD: Yeah, what she said. Also, I didn’t bring any more of these to break.
BRENNIFER AND HAROLD GLARE, SHAKE HEADS AT OFFICER. THEN…
BRENNIFER: Right. So, that happened. And then, I walked over to Harold and said… (TO HAROLD) Everything okay? I heard screaming.
HAROLD: Yeah, it’s cool. I always scream when things are okay.
BRENNIFER: (GESTURES TO SHATTERED FRAMES) You need some help with that?
HAROLD: Nah. That was the last of it. Sorry it took me so long to come back for all this.
BRENNIFER: It’s cool. I’m sorry nobody bought anything.
HAROLD: Yeah… But at least I got some work out of it.
BRENNIFER: (PUZZLES THIS) (LAUGHS) Oh, yeah. That weird couple. How’d that work out?”
HAROLD: (LAUGHS) Sophia’s not weird…
BRENNIFER: (GRIMACES) Aw, shit…
HAROLD: (BLINKS) What?
BRENNIFER: You dumb bastard. How long have you been fucking her?
HAROLD: (CONSIDERS THIS) What?
BRENNIFER: (TO OFFICER) You getting this?
OFFICER: (READS) “You dumb bastard. How long have you been fucking her?” (TO BRENNIFER) What next?
BRENNIFER: Right. Well. Then, this dude comes up and–
BRENNIFER: Just watch.
BRENNIFER GESTURES FOR THINGS TO PROCEED.
OLIVER ENTERS, PUNCHES AND KNOCKSOUT HAROLD.
OLIVER: (TO BRENNIFER) How was that?
BRENNIFER: Perfect. Thank you.
OFFICER: Wait. You didn’t think to warn your friend–
BRENNIFER: (SHAKES HEAD) No, no, no… Harold and I screwed a few times in the utility closet after hours. We weren’t friends.
OFFICER TAKES IN THE PINK-HAIRED WOMAN IN FRONT OF HIM, WONDERS IF SHE SELLS MINERALS OR WEED. THEN…
OFFICER: Right. So, you didn’t think to warn Harold that a (READS NOTES) “very angry dude” was about to start a fight with him?
BRENNIFER: (SHAKES HEAD AGAIN) No. Not a fight – an ass-kicking. The dude threw one punch, then left.
OFFICER: Okay… But why didn’t you say anything to Harold?
BRENNIFER: (SHRUGS) Maybe I thought he had it coming.