Rock Punk Rock. August 27, 2018

I love punk rock–the sound, the spirit, the catharsis. Raw, unashamed of what it is. This rebellious rejection of norms and expectations. To have my stand-up compared to such things by a band I sincerely love for their classic sound and style (and the personal and professional respect I have for the members) means the […]

01:30 AM. August 26, 2018

Because I can’t sleep. What if Hell is a perpetual state of disappointment? — 01:30 AM. Steve Arviso. 2018.

You’re Killing Me, Smalls. August 24, 2018

If you groan after reading this one, it becomes even more meta. Available in Cable-Knit Sweater, an on-going poetry collection on Wattpad. Get the free mp3. Words hurt more than you think. My cousin choked one morning on a mouthful of Alpha-Bits. Cut-off his air supply for three minutes. Now, he’s brain damaged. — You’re Killing Me, Smalls. […]

Thoughtless. August 23, 2018

Sometimes, for the life of me, I actually have nothing of value to say. Of course, this is a problem when I’m trying to keep this shit flowin’ on the daily. Available in Cable-Knit Sweater, a poetry collection available on Wattpad. Get the free mp3. The silence that exists in the void of my mind deafens me with […]

Mei. August 22, 2018

Of all things, Mei might very well be what initially drew me to Overwatch. I remember joining the BETA test and not being entirely sold on the game and its colorful world and cast of characters. But this chubby, adorable genius who gleefully laughed as she put a shard of ice through player’s skull? In […]

Radical Dreamers. August 20, 2018

“I’m a dreamer stuck in the real world.” — Sir Sly, Fun Read this and more in Cable-Knit Sweater, an on-going poetry collection available on Wattpad. Get the free mp3. I live in a land of broken dreams, hiking, crawling barefoot through shattered reflections, kaleidoscopes of endless possibilities carving, tearing, rending, stained in the blood and tears trailing […]

Maybe One Day. August 17, 2018

Every single day. Read this and more in Cable-Knit Sweater, an on-going poetry collection available on Wattpad. Get the free mp3. There are still mornings I turn to that place beneath the avocado tree, hoping to find you there. — Maybe One Day. Steve Arviso. 2018.

As Below. August 16, 2018

It’s said the road to Hell is paved with good intentions. So maybe, just maybe, we shouldn’t be too surprised where we end up if we also fail to consider we might be a wee bit lost. Available in Cable-Knit Sweater, a poetry collection available on Wattpad. Get the free mp3. It’s not in me to trust the […]

Adrift. August 15, 2018

After a certain point, subtlety loses all meaning. I never wish for anyone to find themselves near that point. It’s hauntingly beautiful. But it’ll take you if you let it. Available in Cable-Knit Sweater, a poetry collection on Wattpad. Get the free mp3. A nudge to a boat adrift in the middle of the fuckin’ ocean ain’t gonna […]

Mr. Nice Guy. August 14, 2018

Love is easy. Relationships are hard. One you fall in and out of. The other requires constant work and maintenance from both. Unfortunately, many people want some mass-produced token of either that they can keep in their pocket to look at only when the mood strikes them. Available in Cable-Knit Sweater, a poetry collection available on Wattpad. Get […]

Ups and Down. August 13, 2018

We all have our poisons of choice. And they all have their ups and downs. Available in Cable-Knit Sweater, a poetry collection available on Wattpad. Get the free mp3. Can’t say I know much ’bout pissin’ drunk in the dead of night, but I know the horrors of wiping my ass while high as fuck. — Ups and […]

Made You Look. August 10, 2018

I always do my best to perform for an audience. And I disappoint myself when if I feel like I didn’t live up to my own expectations, even if I do net laughs. Wrestling taught me to respect that fragile relationship between performer and audience, but comedy makes me earn it every single time. And […]

X-Factor. August 8, 2018

I am a man whose view of the world is seen through the lens of pop culture. For better, or for worse. Available in Cable-Knit Sweater, a poetry collection available on Wattpad. Get the free mp3. I’m an all-American man of steel, a jerk with a mouth, an accident of evolution, blood radioactive, words, cut like diamond, gamma-bombs […]

The Man Outside August 7, 2018

One part dream, one part weed-induced delusion. Or maybe I did see some weird shit. I’m not sure. All I know is that it was some freaky shit that makes for a fun little…thing. Get the free mp3. Sometimes I dream of a shape of a man, little more than a vague approximation—two arms, two […]

My Personal Hell. August 7, 2018

Legitimately a recurring setting in a not-entirely reoccurring dream. The story always changes, but the setting, people, and things never do. Available in Cable-Knit Sweater, a poetry collection available on Wattpad. Get the free mp3. There’s a place in my dreams a roadside hotel infinity high, and forever across a labrynth of stairwells a webbing of hallways infinite […]

Unproductive. August 6, 2018

I find it difficult to not keep myself productive. It’s an unhealthy mentality, for sure. I’m happiest when I produce. But I’m also at my most vulnerable when I can’t, when I come up short, or when I’m simply unhappy with whatever I’ve offered up to an audience. So I often find myself stressing out […]

From a Certain Point of View. August 2, 2018

I do not like myself. I have great difficulty accepting that there are those who love me, who believe and trust in me. To me, my successes are failures. My failures a shameful reminder that I am not good enough. And sometimes it isn’t until I’ve hit rock-bottom for the umpteenth time that I finally […]

Hard Times. August 2, 2018

The beauty of pro wrestling is the way it can, when done just right, seamlessly blend athletics and theatrics. And “The American Dream” Dusty Rhodes might just be the single-greatest example of how the “perfect package” isn’t always what you’d expect, but perhaps those who boldly defy expectations. This and more can be found in […]

Cream of the Crop. July 31, 2018

The third entry in this seemingly on-going series of transcribing classic pro wrestling promos into poetry. These are the immortal words of the late, great “Macho Man” Randy Savage (along with those of the equally great “Mean” Gene Okerlund. Wrestlemania III at the Silverdome Pontiac, Michigan. It’s a day that I’m certain my guest at […]

Parts Unknown. July 30, 2018

Another pro wrestling promo-turned-poem. This one is also another all-time classic. Enjoy. Hulk Hogan. Have a question to answer your question. As you, Hulk Hogan, travel to Wrestlemania! by conventional means, the normals you travel with experience malfunctions. As you realize all that is left! is total self-destruction. Do you, Hulk Hogan, show self-pity? Do […]